Kevin W. McCarthy

The Professor of On-Purpose

On-Purpose Person

Are You Prepared To Lose To Gain?

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In today’s On-Purpose® Minute, let’s explore the gains to be found in loss! You might be surprised just how effective loss can be to our long-term benefit.

How do you deal with loss? What is loss?

Are you prepared to have loss in order to gain?

Locallygrown-produceCould it be that loss and—more importantly—learning how to deal with loss are simply as organic to life as the vegetable section at your local Whole Foods store?

In The On-Purpose Person, I reference fighters, floaters, fleers, and flitters as “styles” for dealing with stress and life. There, you’re encouraged to be a navigator, one who leads and manages through change rather than reacting to and being a victim of it. It takes an inherent calm and peace.

As a formerly ranked tennis player, when I have been in “the zone” on the court, I play without the stress and strain of forcing my play. Things just seem to click better. The secret to getting and staying in the zone to some degree is detaching from the usual expected outcome—to win the match.

The ability to play better comes from navigating the experience positively. It is hard to keep this “above the fray” mindset, but when one does, the body and mind are able to perform seemingly without effort.

In business, on the tennis court, or on the golf course, I’ve seen far too many talented people tighten up for fear of loss. This “choking” isn’t a personal failure; it is a growing experience if we allow it to be instructive versus destructive.

Oddly, loss is important to our health, well-being, and finances because it helps us to mature and grow.

Sailors on a ship may not be aware of the big picture or have the experience to place what is happening to the ship in a proper context. A ship’s captain, however, brings the capacity to navigate the shoals and shores safely even in a storm.

If you are learning—and we’re all life-long learners—then anticipate there are situations when you are a sailor and other times when you are a captain.

Learn from your losses, and your life passage will be calmer and more productive as you gain from each loss.

Freeing Yourself from Divided Interests

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Freeing Yourself from Divided InterestsWhen do I say “yes” and when do I say “no”?

Having recently had another birthday I got thinking about life, time, and what I might do with the remainder of my earthly time frame.

None of us knows what this time frame might be, but as we get older we sure know that our time on earth goes very quickly.

It’s a bit scary as well as sobering and challenging!

What I do know is that each of us has a Purpose and we are called to live this out in all aspects of our lives whether it is work, family, relationships, finances, or in our physical, intellectual, and spiritual life accounts.

I also am aware that confusing and divided interests have a high cost.

… The more divided our interests,
the more diluted our lives can become …

Every relationship we nurture, every activity in which we engage, every cause we get involved with, and every decision about what we will own and where we will live has a time, energy, concentration, and often financial cost attached to it. They all require some investment of life. The more divided our interests, the more diluted our lives can become.

To use a business analogy, the advice consistently received and given at business marketing seminars and workshops is to ensure your target market is “an inch wide and a mile deep”. Using a scatter gun approach to business is costly both in terms of time and money. A laser beam is more effective than a fluorescent light when it comes to focussing on your target market!

… Knowing your number one core want or top priority
is exhilarating and freeing …

I don’t want to push the analogy too far. But I am suggesting that our life in general should be like knowing our targeting market. We need to use a laser beam when it comes to investing our time wisely and intentionally in each of our seven life “accounts”. Knowing your number one core want or top priority for each, is exhilarating and freeing.

Your life will no longer be “out of control” nor will you get pulled in a thousand different directions as you live up to others’ expectations.

Here is an example of someone who undertook this process as part of the On-Purpose® Personal Leadership and Coaching Program.

After brainstorming his wants in each of the seven life accounts (usually around 12 to 16 for each life area) he developed his “core” or number one want for each. These were his heart’s desires and reflected his current season of life. (Our wants and priorities do change as we find ourselves in different circumstances and as we transition to different life seasons.)

Life Account (LA): Vocational/Career
Core Want or Top Priority (CW): Work to be a creative expression of my life’s meaning

LA: Spiritual
CW: Be closer to “god”

LA: Family
CW: Become a stronger leader in my family

LA: Physical/Health/Recreational
CW: Feeling radiant

LA: Social/Friends
CW: Invest time with those who energise and uplift me

LA: Intellectual
CW: Being creative – researching, writing and sharing

LA: Financial
CW: Develop wisdom in my attitude and use of money

LA: Other
CW: Honestly confront my relationship with “Tammy” (alias)

Now you might see this as a fluorescent light across his life, but over 100 “wants” were lasered down to one for each of his life accounts. Through using the On-Purpose® Tournament Process he was able to move from confusion to clarity. (Each of these was turned into an On-Purpose® SMART goal with accompanying action steps to achieve these.)

This process can give you profound insights into your life and confidence to move in the direction of your chosen visions, missions, and values.

These of course are not your Purpose but they nevertheless should align with it.

… We can live with clarity and not in a state of confusion …

So when we get clarity around what matters most in our life, we no longer need to march to the beat of other people’s drums. We can live with clarity and not in a state of confusion.

What will be certain is that you will not be heard to say … “my life is out of control” and that is because you are free from divided interests.

You will be able to confidently, clearly, and more consistently say “yes” to your carefully considered top priorities and “no” more often to those things that take you off track, drain your energy and distract you from aligning your life to your Purpose and core values.

… your life is too important to be left to chance …

So, how about undertaking an “audit” on your life? Divided interests are costly and your life is too important to be left to chance, distracting projects, and unnecessary anxieties.

Maybe it’s time for you to re-examine your relationships, vocations, activities, commitments, possessions, and living arrangements and to find what you want most from life.

Are you up for the challenge?

As Socrates once famously said, “The unexamined life is not worth living!”

Maybe right now you are wanting to manage your life better and get the important things done; have more time with your partner, family and friends; unshackle the thinking that has held you back; set clear, purposeful goals in your seven “life accounts”; do the things you really want to do and get more fun back into your life.

… be clear about what you want,
prioritise these, action them and implement them …

Our On-Purpose® Life Planning and Coaching Program will lead you to your core wants in all areas of your life.

Our unique tools and processes ensure that you will be clear about what you want, prioritise these, action them and implement them.

You will gain a clear vision for each of your seven life “accounts”, you will have clear missions for your life and values that are in alignment with your purpose, visions and missions.

Now how powerful is that?

© Dr Edward Gifford, On-Purpose Partners®

Queensland, Australia

www.onpurposepartners.com.au

On-Purpose Leader Experience: Webcast 1 Replay

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“What am I going to do when I grow up?” 

It is funny
when we say it, yet the price of not really knowing who we are as
grown-ups is needlessly expensive to every aspect of our lives.

I
get it!  You’re stretched to the max and burdened under more
commitments than you have time.  Life is wrapped so tight, that you’re
not sure where to begin with making your life make sense.

Now, you
can test drive The On-Purpose Leader Experience
which is based on
The On-Purpose Person.  Listen and watch the replay of the
introductory webcast by CLICKING HERE.   You will be taken to
the replay page.   Be
sure to click on “SLIDES” in the upper left hand
corner so you can watch and listen.

The program includes
five
remaining webcasts, replays, and web site support.

Experience what it
means to be on-purpose and to be in a community of on-purpose persons in
creation for the six plus weeks while the Experience is happening.  The next Experience begins on September 8, 2010.   Preregistration is now open.  You can also register here.

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

CLICK HERE  to watch

On-Purpose Minutes by Kevin W. McCarthy
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The On-Purpose Leader Experience

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Do you want to be a better leader of your life?

For the longest time you've promised yourself you would work the
process in The On-Purpose Person, right?  But you haven't!  Today
you can make good to yourself on your promise.

Join me for The On-Purpose Leader Experience, a six-week immersion in being on-purpose that will transform your life for good.  Here's
your
chance to do right by yourself.  You will:
OP_leader_logos_blue

  • Clarify and organize your life around what matters most
  • Write your statements of purpose, vision, missions, and values
  • Gather, mix, and mingle with other On-Purpose Persons
  • Gain membership to a 24/7 private web group supporting your journey
  • Ask questions of Kevin on conference calls and in forums and
    discussion groups
  • Have a workbook with everything you need to work the On-Purpose Process and track your progress.

Enroll
today in the full six-week experience for just $127.  Enroll with a friend and
your investment is $1.80 each per day!  Look for the Companion Special (2
persons for only $150).

Be On-Purpose!
Kevin

PS:  Did you catch The On-Purpose Leader Experience
webcast?  Invest an hour and improve your life and your business.  CLICK
HERE to watch the first webcast.

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The On-Purpose Leader Experience: Session 1 Replay

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OPLeaderimage "What am I going to do when I grow up?" 

It is funny
when we say it, yet the price of not really knowing who we are as
grown-ups is needlessly expensive to every aspect of our lives.

I
get it!  You're stretched to the max and burdened under more
commitments than you have time.  Life is wrapped so tight, that you're
not sure where to begin with making your life make sense.

Now, you
can test drive The On-Purpose Leader Experience which is based on
The On-Purpose Person.  Listen and watch the replay of the introductory webcast by CLICKING HERE.   You will be taken to
the replay page.   Be sure to click on "SLIDES" in the upper left hand
corner so you can watch and listen.

The program includes five
remaining webcasts, replays, and web site support.  Enrollment for
this series ends: Tuesday, June 1, midnight. 

Experience what it means to be on-purpose and to be in a community of on-purpose persons in creation.

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

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The On-Purpose Leader Teleseminar Replay

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86"What am I going to do when I grow up?" 

It is funny when we say it, yet the price of not really knowing who we are as grown-ups is needlessly expensive to every aspect of our lives.

I get it!  You're stretched to the max and burdened under more
commitments than you have time.  Life is wrapped so tight, that you're
not sure where to begin with making your life make sense.

Now, you can test drive The On-Purpose Leader program which is based on The On-Purpose Person.  Listen and watch the replay of the introductory broadcast by CLICKING HERE.   You will be taken to the replay page.   Be sure to click on "SLIDES" in the upper left hand corner so you can watch and listen.

The program includes four remaining teleseminars, replays, and web site support.  Enrollment for this series ends: Wednesday, March 10, midnight. 

Reblog this post [with Zemanta]

Jim Weiss Radio Interview

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My family and I have been great fans of Jim Weiss of Greathall Productions for many years.

Greathall Productions helps to produce Great Minds!  Our children, Charles and Anne, grew up listening to the amazing story telling of Jim Weiss.  Here’s a man whose voice wraps around a character’s personality to bring it to life.  Jim’s ability to capture the essence of meaning of a story in a few choice words is remarkably educational and entertaining.  We read to the kids when they were little tykes.  Afterward, we would often put on a Jim Weiss tape to lull them to sleep.  We continued the practice until they got older and could read on their own.  Their interest in our reading to them waned but
their desire for a good bedtime story never ceased.   As teens I would often pass by their rooms at night and hear Charles or Anne listening to  Jim’s soothing voice and fabulous tales as they drifted off to sleep.  Now donning headphones, I haven’t a clue what they’re listening to and I’m going to bed before they are!

A cool story about Jim reveals how he owns his stories.  He was a guest on my radio show.  Rather than impose upon him to tell a story on the air, I brought into the studio an audio tape of Robin Hood.  I gave it to the audio engineer to play coming out of a break so listeners could hear Jim.   The tape played for about 15 seconds and then jammed.  Jim offered to finish the story live.  He picked it right up, went into character, and delivered it flawlessly.  You should have seen the eyes around the studio; Alan, my co-host on the show was blown away… as was I.

Jim Weiss is truly a treasure for every generation in your family.  Grandparents and parents alike will enjoy sitting with the kids listening to Greathall Productions and discussing the stories.   Do yourself a
favor, visit Greathall Productions, and buy a CD or ten!

Learning to Lead Starts With Yourself

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Watch this video interview I did with Factor77 to gain insight into on-purpose concepts.  Some of the questions asked and answered are below.

  • Was there something you went through personally that made you write your book?
  • What is your methodology for taking a step back in today’s world and being able to figure out what the heck you're doing?
  • Why do you say a balanced life is a myth?
  • So if you're doing what you love there should be no balance?
  • How do you go out and find the right people to keep you motivated?
  • How do you know when it’s time to stop and look around at what you're doing and take that first step?
  • How do you feel satisfied at the end of the day instead of stressed out?