kwmccarthy

Is An Unhealthy Relationship Killing You?

November 21, 2017 By kwmccarthy

This On-Purpose Minute is designed to save lives. Perhaps it is you or someone you know who is caught in a cycle (yo-yo) of unhealthy weight gain and loss.

Why do we stay in unhealthy relationships? I’ve watched the reality crime shows on TV of domestic abuse and often wondered why people stay. It is easier to see the predicament of others than that of oneself.

I am recovering from an unhealthy relationship with chocolate, sugar, and ice cream—especially chocolate chip cookies. Watch today’s On-Purpose^® Minute and see if you relate to my issue and what I’ve done to gain health in my life for the rest of my life.

Obesity in adults is highly avoidable.

Figuring out how not to eat or choosing “the best diet” for yourself or deciding what exercise program to start or having gastric bypass surgery are delaying tactics for too often avoiding the underlying and very real issues of weight gain.

A revised nutritional lifestyle is essential.

Before I had my health coach, you can’t imagine how many weight loss mythologies and misunderstandings I had about eating, dieting, and exercise. It is no wonder I was adding 2 to 4 pounds of weight per year and yo-yoing my weight throughout the year.

I have to thank Lori and Dr. Wayne Scott Andersen for helping me better understand and approach my unhealthy relationship. Any health advice I have to offer herein can be traced to what I’ve learned from Lori and Dr. A. They’ve saved the quality of my life and now I’m paying it forward.

First, take care of you. Then, like me, you’ll have something to give to others. You, too, can save people’s lives from the self-inflicted diseases brought on by being overweight or obese. You, too, can learn to better manage your type 2 diabetes, cholesterol, high blood pressure, and more that is brought on by your choices and habits.

There is a better way. Dr. A calls it “Optimal Health.”

Please let our health coaches help you get to a healthy weight and learn how to stay there. The quality of your life depends on it.

If a doctor or health coach is forwarding this blog posting to you, then follow up with him or her to help you redefine your unhealthy relationship with food.
If you need an introduction to a health coach like the one who helped me, then contact me and I’ll set it up for you. Reach me at info@on-purpose.com. Add “Health Coach Request” to the subject line.
If you need to talk with a counselor or therapist to help you overcome what’s eating you, then let me make an introduction for you. Reach me at info@on-purpose.com. Add “Counselor Request” to the subject line.

Be On-Purpose!
Kevin

P.S. Have you read FIT 4 Leading? In this book I address the top four obstacles to success. As you might have guessed, one of the four is health. Learn what you can do to become a better leader of your life.

Will My Life Make A Difference?

November 14, 2017 By kwmccarthy

One of Life’s Great Questions is “Will My Life Make A Difference?”

It is an important question because it generally reflects an early mile-marker on the road toward a life of meaning, significance, and purpose. Realistically, it is a road filled with character-building potholes and detours for all but the fortunate.

Asking the question is an indicator of getting beyond oneself and thinking about the well-being of others. Here’s the beginning of maturity.

Age is irrelevant because the desire to make a difference is an attitude of the heart.

The decision to make a difference with one’s life is a choice toward becoming a leader.

While a heroic act may have a defining element of difference-making and reveal strength of character in a moment, true difference-making is a way of life being lived in service.

2-Word Purpose Statements begin with a generic set-up of “I exist to serve by …” in order to help us realize that the flow and development of our “difference-making” capability and delivery matters as much over time as it does in a single act.

In fact, failing to act or to be the hero can be devastating to our psyche. Playing games of “what if” and “if only I had” are inevitable but ultimately counterproductive. Instead of being riddled with guilt or despair, prepare for the next moment, the next and the next to be difference-making in the best sense of the concept.

Over the years, many a person has told me, “At some point in my life, I figured I needed to make a change in my life. I’ve discovered that my purpose is to make a difference.” And they’re incompletely right.

While celebrating this important statement, I’ll ever so gently press and ask, “Have you considered how you are uniquely called to be a difference maker?” My hope is to move them toward a more specific understanding and depth of seeing their greater contribution in more precise terms.

Of course, the next logical question is, “How will I make a difference?”

When it comes to answering the question, here are three morsels of advice:

1. “Don’t should on yourself!”

2. Visit ONPURPOSE.me. Thanks to ONPURPOSE.me, within minutes of starting you can discover your purpose in just 2 words. Knowing your purpose is life changing!

3. Your 2-word purpose provides the specifics to and uniqueness of your difference-making endeavor. Without it, you’re at a strategic and practical disadvantage.

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Bonus Resource: Here’s an added resource to today’s topic. This is written by my friend and colleague, Tana Greene, CEO–CLO of Blue Bloodhound. Read her remarkable story in Inc. Magazine. Click the cover to purchase the book.

What Kind of Business Owner Are You?

November 9, 2017 By kwmccarthy

Business owners are anyone with a job to do.

In The On-Purpose Business Person I write about the Think Inc! mindset and the importance of taking on responsibility. Blame is the easily spread dung of cowards. They avoid consequences, but will revel in results.

To put oneself on the line along with the ensuing consequences (good or bad) takes guts.

If you’ll simply get started with assuming responsibilities, you’ll be amazed at how it feeds your confidence and fuels your growth. Rarely will you blow it. Always will you learn from it. The more you attempt, improve, and succeed, then the more opportunity and increasing responsibility will come your way.

Hopefully, you have an executive coach or mentor who helps you sort and think through your responses and lessons when you miss. Your confidant can give you perspective when you miss or hit the mark plus help you raise the bar of what’s possible for you next.

One of the most important roles of a business owner is to set and create a culture or an environment.

How well are you doing with those around you? We can be slack about it or intentional. We can encourage the taking of responsibility or we can crush it. The same holds true at home. It reflects an approach to life, marriage, rearing children, or volunteering for a committee at a not-for-profit.

As a result of this On-Purpose Business Minute, please challenge yourself to truly reflect on this important aspect of leading by taking responsibility for yourself, your actions, and your choices.

Just what kind of business owner are you?

Is It Lonely At The Top? Delegation Can Help.

November 2, 2017 By kwmccarthy

Chapter 20 of the 1998 version of The On-Purpose Business is titled The Micro-Business, a term I coined then to describe a growing trend of the workplace moving into the homestead. SoHo is a subsequent term that means “Small Office, Home Office.” In the updated version of The On-Purpose Business Person, I decided to go with a new term: Solo Owners. This term includes the one person shop as well as the single owner or couple with employees.

All of these terms describe a growing percentage of the working population who are setting up business from their home either by design or by necessity because of being out of work. These are the brave men and women who tackle the many challenges of owning a small business.

Typically, it is best to think of Solo Owners as one-person shops with support that is either virtual or in close proximity.

Professionals such as doctors, lawyers, CPAs, architects, and engineers
Skilled trades like carpenters, plumbers, and landscapers
Independent cottage industrialists, inventors, counselors, coaches, consultants, and salespersons
Creative persons like artists, musicians, writers, and songwriters

Many operate micro-franchises such as those found in the direct sales industry with MLMs and party plan companies.

Solo Owners are diverse, but their challenges are actually quite predictable.

They share a common ailment: what they imagined it would be like and what it is really like are different from what they anticipated.

If you are a Solo Owner, you’ll probably relate to the challenges of getting things accomplished, managing your time, and the constant learning process. The absence of co-workers and mentors is frequently mentioned as well.

What to do? Here’s a simple business leadership growth plan:

Learn about business
Learn to lead yourself and others
Learn how to cooperate and work with others

Solo Owners easily fall into the trap of what I call Hellegation™ – the inability to delegate that creates a living hell on the job. You have a choice: delegation or Hellegation! Follow the advice above and you’re on your way to salvation.

If you’re really stuck, then invest in On-Purpose Executive Coaching to find the freedom business ownership promises to provide.

So, what are your challenges with being lonely at the top and the bottom?

Please share a tip for other Solo Owners below in the comments section. Or ask a question and I’ll add what I can to answer your questions, direct you to resources, or point you toward someone else who can assist you. Others may help you as well. We solo owners need each other. Let’s start now.

Be On-Purpose!
Kevin

What Makes for a Good Day’s Work?

October 19, 2017 By kwmccarthy

What is your measure for a good day’s work?

Chances are you know a good day when you have one, but do you have any specific measures that you could apply to your workday? If you don’t have specific measures, then is it any surprise that so many days are less than fulfilling?

A consistent comment I hear from business advisory clients is dissatisfaction and lack of personal productivity.

Because most of my clients are business owners, CEOs, and presidents, they tend to measure company sales and profits as the basis of success. Of course, that measure is really one for the business, not the person.

Today I’m turning to you to share your standard(s) for what makes for a good day’s work for you. Please use the comments section below today’s On-Purpose Business Minute to share your thoughts with all of us.

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

Why Is Life So Hard?

October 10, 2017 By kwmccarthy

In this On-Purpose Minute we’re exploring one of the greatest hidden impediments to living a better life: confused language, in general, and—specifically—the words of strategy and planning. Purpose, vision, and mission are used synonymously though they are not the same. Each has a unique quality, capacity, and meaning.

Each strategic term of Purpose, Vision, Mission, and Values answers a specific question and speaks to a distinct aspect of personal and organizational strategy.

Purpose: Why do I exist? (Being: Identity and worth)

Vision: Where am I going? (Seeing: Direction and dreams)

Mission: What do I do? (Doing: Planning and action)

Values: What is important? (Choosing: Decisions and importance)

On-Purpose, therefore, is when your heart, head, and hands are aligned and integrated with the highest values.

On-Purpose^® is both a process and state of being strategically integrated while giving practical expression to who you truly are. You prosper others and yourself—it’s a win–win. As a result, you can’t help but make a difference.

Too many of us live our lives desperately seeking “to make a difference.” It is a noble aspiration, but a misguided approach. When the focus is the result and not the cause, then we’re almost sure to get distracted and detoured.

Instead, focus on becoming the personal leader of your life.

Know who you are—really.

Write your 2-word purpose statement.
Invest the time to clarify your vision and missions.
Specify your values—the boundaries and guidelines of your life that matter most to your overall health and well-being.

Need help? Explore The On-Purpose Shop for books, tools, coaching, and more.

Decay and destruction are easier than growth and construction. Being on-purpose is work … but consider the alternative. And that, dear reader, is why life is so hard.

Rock–paper–scissors chart (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When there isn’t agreement on the definitions of Purpose, Vision, Missions, and Values—but plans are made with them—then those plans are confused. Confused plans result in under-performance. Under-performance calls for a review and update of the plans. Rock–Paper–Scissors!

Can a good old game of Rock–Paper–Scissors help you to unlock the difficulties of your life?

Yes!

Rock breaks scissors.
Scissors cut paper.
Paper covers rock.

We know the rules and the game.

The problem isn’t the process, tools, or sincerity of the people. The problem is outside of the system. The terms of leadership and strategy are confused so the entire “game” is rigged against you to almost always fall short.

Have you ever asked yourself, Why am I so frustrated and overwhelmed? Do you think you’re crazy or something is wrong with you?

If you’re crazy, then you don’t know you’re crazy. If you think you’re crazy, then you’re sane enough to know you’re not going mad. All this, therefore, means you aren’t crazy—just stressed, worn, and detoured from the life of your dreams but not the life of your reality.

When the world within us is confused, directionless, and searching, to assume the world outside of us is going to magically provide what we’re looking for is stepping on the unhealthy path of voluntary victimhood.

To make sense of the world about you, make sense of your life.

Start with consistent definitions of purpose, vision, missions, and values. Then, answer the questions above. The On-Purpose Person provides the method and steps to lead your life on-purpose.

Life After Business Interview

October 5, 2017 By kwmccarthy

Listen to Kevin W. McCarthy’s interview about Finding Your Purpose in Business and Life.

Join Kevin as he is interviewed by Ryan Tansom of Life After Business.

Learn what it means to build a company of leaders. Discover where entrepreneurs go off course when it comes to identifying and sticking to their purpose.

The interview is approximately 60 minutes.

Why Am I Fearful?

October 3, 2017 By kwmccarthy

Does fear interfere with your life, business, or career?

What’s your fear? What are you fearful of? Where in your life do you say, “I am afraid of … ,” yet you know it is a hang-up—not a danger to your life or limb?

Would you like to be at a place where you can say, “I am not afraid” … and mean it? Read on!

Fear, like pain, is partially designed to be our friend, not our foe.

Fear keeps us from being in harm’s way.
Fear protects us from injury, peril, and even death.
Fear provides for self-preservation.

This is our good or helpful fear.

Bad or harmful fear debilitates our inherent motivation and destroys our confidence. The ripple effects beyond oneself can damage relationships, opportunities, jobs, finances, and more.

Fear can be an occupying foe taking up unjust strongholds in our spirit, mind, and body.
Fear can lead to anxiety that spawns a panic attack that triggers the fight or flight reaction.

This fear is unhealthy in every aspect.

Fear is not to be necessarily avoided; it is, however, to be understood.

Fear is a God-given guidepost to growth and healing. Facing fear, however, is not a solitary endeavor. Be wise and seek the help of a professional counselor or therapist skilled in working you through your fear in a progressive manner.

Why bother?

If you’re locked in unhealthy fears, your aspirations and dreams are muted.

When fear prevails it is hard to be on-purpose.