Kevin W. McCarthy

The Professor of On-Purpose

Work Life Balance

God & The Chocolate Ice Cream

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I am a fan of Nic Askew, the creator of Soul Biographies.  "God & The Chocolate Ice Cream" starring Michael Neill offers provocative thoughts on the integration of the spiritual and material worlds – the space where I like to play and work.  Invest a few minutes and watch this short film that is embedded below. 

Ironically, before opening my computer and watching this video, I awoke about 5:30 a.m. and went to the freezer.  Last night I bought a quart of chocolate ice cream against my better judgment.  I at

Chocolate ice creamImage via Wikipedia

e about half of the chocolate ice cream.  At 5:32 a.m. I pulled off the ice cream lid and turned the container upside down over the kitchen sink drain so it would thaw and disappear.  My decision was based on reasons of both health and spiritual discipline. 

From a health perspective I am 15 pounds over my goal weight.  I know I need to get back on the Health Program my wife coaches.  More importantly, the chocolate ice cream is a metaphorical impediment to my stewardship of all that God has given me.  Think of it as Jacob's hip or the thorn in Paul's flesh.  I've learned in talking with Judith and other health coaches, ultimately, it isn't what we're eating, it is what's eating at us.

My irrational desire for sugar, cream, and chocolate is more akin to an addiction.  It provides a profound empathy for the heroin or cocaine addict.  Truly, there, but by the grace of God go I.  It is a "no" to which I so often say "yes" (watch the video to understand).  Left unchecked, it would consume my life prematurely.  Intellectually I get it, yet lust takes over.  In this regard, I also relate to the sins of Tiger Woods.  Fortunately, my lust is more socially acceptable and less morally reprehensible.  Yet, make no mistake, it is lust gone awry.

I am reminded of Matthew 7:5: "You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you
will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."  This scripture causes me to hold my tongue at the failings of others.  I'm making the attempt to avoid being a hypocrite!

So why dump the ice cream down the drain?  I've learned the best way to avoid sin is to not cozy too close to it.  Healthy boundaries make for a healthy life.  Sure, it is a fix, not a cure.  Until the deep work in my soul is reconciled, I settle for temporary acts of protection.  

Perhaps, now dear reader, you'll appreciate why I am a fan of Nic Askew.  He stirs the spirit of one who is in the business of stirring spirits.  My hope is my On-Purpose Minutes provoke you is similar fashion.

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

'god & the chocolate ice cream' from Nic Askew on Vimeo.

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Embrace Life

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SeatbeltImage via Wikipedia

All I can say is, "Wow!" 

Thank you Sussex Roads Partnership for sharing this message of seat belt use safety.  This adds a whole new meaning to buckle up, family love, and the guardian angel nature of seat belts.  

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What does it take to be a success?

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I found this presentation on TED that breaks down some of the key qualities of being on-purpose.   RIchard St. John was asked a simple question by a teenager.   His pursuit of the answer lead to 500 interviews over 7 years with successful people.  In 3 minutes Richard provides great insight in an entertaining manner.  Enjoy!

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What’s Your Valentines Day Advice?

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20680_1323712497320_1366104299_918444_5919804_nWhat's your greatest advice for keeping your marriage together?  Let me hear from you on this one!  With Valentines Day fast approaching, it would be great to gather some insights – serious and humorous alike.

The "best advice" I ever got was from a man married for 39 years.  I was in college at the time and his daughter was a dear friend of mine. As he drank his morning coffee, I asked, "Mr. Collier, to what do you attribute the longevity of your marriage to Mrs. Collier?"

Immediately he answered, "Early in our marriage we came to an agreement that I would make all the big decisions in our marriage and my bride would handle all the small decisions.  Amazingly, in 39 years of marriage there has been nothing but small decisions."

I can remember laughing as he shared that advice.  After over 25 years of marriage to my bride, I fully appreciate his humorous wisdom even more.  If only I had listened better…

Be On-Purpose!
Kevin

PS: Photo is the McCarthy Family:  Charles, Judith, Anne, and Kevin

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The Christmas Gift of Being On-Purpose!

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TOPP_3D_PrintedBookAre you looking for the ideal Christmas present – a gift of a life time?  Give The On-Purpose Person to those who need the gift of knowing their life can make a difference and matters profoundly even if their present circumstances may indicate otherwise.  

When you order the book online with us, be sure to use the comment section if you would like to have the book personalized and autographed.   This offer expires on Monday, Dec. 21 at noon. 

What Anchors Your Health?

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If you don't know your purpose for being then you are missing out on life… literally.  As you ponder your New Year's Resolutions consider not just what, but why for each of them.

In November, Florida Hospital launched a campaign called Healthy 100.  Their web site headline says,"Have
you ever thought that you could live to be 100 years old? How about
being 100 years old and still doing the things you love? It may sound
unbelievable, but at Florida Hospital, we are on a mission to help you
do just that. Through support and education, we want to help you
kick-start your journey to living a healthier, happier life."

Imagine living to be a healthy 100 year old!

Cover of Cover via Amazon

At the launch event (I attended), Dan Buettner, the author of The Blue Zones, engaged us with his case studies and keys to vitality and longevity which are: Right Outlook, Move Naturally, Eat Wisely, Right Tribe.  Afterward, I spoke with Dan about my work with purpose which falls into the Right Outlook category.  He said to me, "Purpose is the anchor to health, yet it remains the most under celebrated aspect.  Research shows that having a purpose in life adds six to seven years of longevity."

In an article Dan wrote in 2008 for AARP, Dan provides this source, “People who feel their life is part of a larger plan and are guided by
their spiritual values have stronger immune systems, lower blood
pressure, a lower risk of heart attack and cancer, and heal faster and
live longer,” says Harold G. Koenig, M.D., professor of psychiatry and
behavioral sciences at Duke University Medical Center, who has studied
the phenomenon broadly.

EXTRA: Watch Dan Buettner's interview with Martha Stewart in the first link.

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Are You Thankful For Your Trials?

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Thanksgiving in the United States is a time of reflection on our many blessings.   Has 2009 been a challenging year thus far and are your prospects… well, let's not go there for now.  So in these times, what can we be thankful for in the midst of the suffering?

In today's On-Purpose® Minute, let's explore a few reasons why trials are reason enough for being thankful.

PLEASE listen to this remarkable (link is here) message by my friend, Scott Alexander.  Are you finding the gold nuggets in the mine of suffering?  Scott's message was given at Willow Creek Church in Winter Springs, FL.   Steve Brown of Key Life Ministries chimes in as well after Scott's message. If you've never heard Steve, then you are in for a double treat.

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

Casting Crowns Music

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Casting Crowns is a contemporary Christian band that just had an article written about them entitled Casting Crowns On Purpose.  In the article, the front man, Mark Hall, shares what it means to have a "life on purpose."  He is really close to understanding the power and potential of being on-purpose. 

Back in the late 1980s when I was teaching about on-purpose in the positive, it was very novel.  Until that time, most people would use on purpose to negate a negative, such as, "I didn't mean to spill my milk on purpose."  I knew then, as I still do today that I am pioneering a positive concept whose time has yet to come.  Even today, most people are seeking their purpose, rather than the follow through of living or being on-purpose.

I envisioned the day when the words and concept of being on-purpose would be in the popular culture.  Well, it continues to creep into everyday use more and more as the Casting Crowns article indicates.  I must admit a certain measure of joy mixed with disappointment because
the general use of purpose is misunderstood and the concept / lifestyle
of being on-purpose is used far too cavalierly. 

Pastor Rick Warren's work, The Purpose Driven Life popularized the use of purpose; unfortunately, it was a watered down version of the concept.  Oh well, I persevere in this calling trusting the results to God.

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin