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How Do You Build Your Confidence?

February 27, 2018 By kwmccarthy


Pointer: I make reference to The Service Model™ in this On-Purpose Minute. Here is a link to review, purchase, and download a copy. Click Here for Your Copy.

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Look at the kid in the front row, fourth from the left! Yep, the one with the rolled-up pants (room to grow) and checkered jacket. That’s yours truly in Mrs. (Lois) Johnson’s Kindergarten in Bethel Park, PA! My guess is the photo was taken in 1960 and I’m five years old. I was one of the youngest kids in this class.

Mrs. Johnson Kindergarten

I was blessed with a very happy childhood. I don’t look really happy on the day of this photograph. Come to think of it, none of the boys look too thrilled to be this close to girls (yuck!) and under such tight control with our hands in our laps!

In reviewing my report card from those days, I read “Kevin is young and lacks confidence.” Fortunately, my parents decided to hold me back a year so I could grow in confidence. Yes, I repeated kindergarten! My parents’ wisdom set me on a more positive trajectory for life. Thanks, Mom and Dad!

Odd that I still remember those words and that label “Kevin … lacks confidence.” It used to really bug me that I was a person who lacked confidence. As I’ve matured, I realize how wrong my understanding of that statement was. Mrs. Johnson was offering feedback to my parents so they could make informed decisions to remedy the matter rather than labeling me. I’m the one who mistakenly “owned” the label. Five- and six-year-old minds do things like that. Sadly, so do 25-, 35-, 45- … year-old minds, too!

Each of us lacks confidence at the start of anything new. Confidence can apply to a skill or aptitude but not to the very nature or soul of a person—that’s just too destructive.

Have you bought a lie that you lack confidence or some other such nonsense? Don’t!

Let’s rephrase the statement and shift your perspective. You just haven’t yet found the bedrock of your beliefs and faith upon which to grow in confidence! I promise you that this solid ground for the soul exists in you. Like innate leadership, you have a place where you are designed and destined to be confident. It is a birthright that you may need to claim (or reclaim). Keep looking!

Look into the eyes of that little boy on the first row then and today in the video. As a person, does he lack confidence today? I’ve been a speaker in arenas in front of thousands. I’ve been on TV and radio broadcasts throughout the USA and Canada. People without confidence don’t do that.

How Do You Build Your Confidence?

There’s the question I’m placing before you. I’ve found the readers of this blog are a bright bunch of people. Please share your insights, comments, or quotes in the Comments section below. Let’s help one another become more confident as leaders of our lives.

Quotes About Confidence

Readers of The On-Purpose Person and The On-Purpose Business Person know that I start each chapter with a quotation. For this post, I turned to my book of quotations about confidence specifically. These quotations will stimulate your thinking:

“I had no vision of the scope of what I would start. But I had confidence that as long as we did our work well and were good to our customers, there would be no limit to us.”

    Sam Walton, Founder of Walmart (1918–1992)

“To do anything in this world worth doing, we must not stand back shivering and thinking of the cold and danger, but jump in, and scramble through as well as we can.”

    Sydney Smith, Anglican Clergyman and writer (1771–1845)

“Fortunate is the person who has developed the self-control to steer a straight course toward his objective in life, without being swayed from his purpose by either commendation or condemnation.”

    Napoleon Hill, Author, Think and Grow Rich

“Calm self-confidence is as far from conceit as the desire to earn a decent living is remote from greed.”

    Channing Pollack, U.S. Magician and Hollywood Actor (1926–2006)

“Confidence is the feeling by which the mind embarks in great and honorable courses with a sure hope and trust in itself.”

     Cicero, Roman philosopher, 1st Century B.C.

 

I leave you with one parting On-Purpose Proverb:

“Awareness of one’s lack of confidence indicates that your heart and your head are still talking. They just need to get the rest of the body moving so the next lesson can be learned more readily.”

My On-Purpose Pants!

June 4, 2008 By kwmccarthy

One of the oddities about an affluent society is our clothes closet.  Many of us who have gained a few pounds over the years have two and, sometimes, three sets of clothes.  I'm not talking seasonal clothing like winter and summer clothes.  No I'm talking normal, fat, and even fatter.  By the time most of us reach "even fatter," we've lost hope and finally given away the normal clothes settling for the fat and even fatter selection. 

Since I've been in the process of reprogramming my eating through the Take Shape For Life system, I've dropped over thirty pounds since April 3.  Yep, 30 pounds in 2 months.  My "even fatter" clothes began drooping on me within a couple of weeks.  After about a month, I was digging around into the "fat" set of clothes.  Now they're bagging. 

Over the weekend I bought two pair of men's pants and a pair of jeans – size 36!  My belts no longer fit either.  I've shrunk out of my 40s and 38s.  I was looking like a homeless guy with baggy pants.  Honestly, I can't remember wearing 36s.  There were none in my closet.  When I played a lot of competitive tennis – some 18 years ago – I was a size 34 tennis short.  So to wear a 36 is like rediscovering my youth.  What a joy for the baby boomer! 

I am still in my fat burning state.  Who knows, could 34s actually be in my life again?  Why not?  Honestly, the image of size 34 was so hopelessly erased from my self-perception that it is still hard for me to imagine it.  And I'm a guy with vision!  Yet I know it is not only possible, it is probable if I simply decide to commit to it.  My goal weight is 190.  At that weight the 36s will probably fit just fine.  Then again size 34 might be just the thing.

There isn't a day that goes by that someone doesn't ask me about my weight loss and tell me how good I look.  Never in my life have I had so many kind words spoken to me about my appearance.  Family, friends, and clients have asked for my help so I decided to get smarter about TSFL so I can better advise them rightly.  Plus, I love to learn.  I am such a fan of Take Shape For Life that I accepted the invitation by Dr. Andersen to be trained as a Health Coach.  I'll be trained by the best so I can help people be on-purpose with their health.  My wife, Judith, is really the person most interested in actually doing the day-to-coaching with coaching.  Together, we'll be learning.  I'm a zealot about this life changing program that has helped move me toward optimal health and away from disease.  I cannot NOT share it with you.

If you've done a want list and tournament on your Physical/Health Life Account and had "lose weight" show up as your top want, then TSFL may be the program just for you.  Do you have an on-purpose plan to trim down and keep off the weight?  Great!  If not, then let's connect… on-purpose.  Wouldn't you like to own a pair of on-purpose pants as well?

Be On-Purpose!

Kevin

Why Does Take Shape For Life Work For Me?

April 12, 2008 By kwmccarthy

As of this morning I weigh 219 – down from 230 8 days ago.  I’ve been pondering this system since I began.  A friend emailed me and asked why is it working for you?

Why it is TSFL working?  Here are a bunch of my thoughts kinda thrown out there:

[Read more…] about Why Does Take Shape For Life Work For Me?

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