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Kevin W. McCarthy

The Professor of On-Purpose

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Boldness

What Is the Heart of Selfless Service?

April 5, 2018 By kwmccarthy

Servant leaders see things differently because their hearts are authentically in their actions, often despite the personal circumstances and consequences. In short, they’ve learned how to love their neighbors in a healthy, respectful, and others-centric manner.

One of The On-Purpose Proverbs is “Boldness occurs when passion rises and vanity falls.” In 60 seconds, the public service announcement brings this On-Purpose Proverb to life and is sure to bring a tear to your eye.

While this amazing film-making short called “Gesto de Amor” (Gesture of Love) highlights the empathy and love of the little girl, the loving act of her brother reveals that he may, in fact, be the inspirational source of servant leadership for her gesture of love. He is reaping what he has sown into his sister.

Don’t we want to be known and understood from within? … especially in this crazy world where sick is good, cool is hot, and swag is no longer a “sophisticated wild ass guess”?

Consider showing this video to your team and asking them what they’re doing to see things from the perspective of their customers (or loved ones). Nothing is harder, yet little is more rewarding. That makes it all the more meaningful when we sincerely get it right as servant leaders who can wear another person’s cap. You can’t have “Customer Confluence” without it.

Emotional intelligence (EI), made known largely by Daniel Goleman’s book Emotional Intelligence, is our ability to understand the state of our emotions and others with the ability to process and respond in a productive manner. Some people have an intuition or instinct for sensing the emotions. For others, it can be learned and developed.

Asking sincere and clarifying questions, rather than making assumptions, is a healthy practice to develop without regard to your EI. On a personal level, it develops trust and can lead to intimacy of conversation. On a corporate basis, it is called market research and leads to customer insights that can ultimately be incorporated into an offering to better serve the customer.

Mostly, however, this degree of interest in serving well comes from a heart of serving, wanting to genuinely profit the other person.

This attitude of the heart, the desire to make a positive difference or contribution, is a God-planted seed given each and every person. For some, the seed lies dormant and uncultivated. For others, it begins but gets trampled on and withers. For some, it flourishes and multiplies itself in unexpected ways … the gift of a shirt rolled with hair in a returning gesture of love.

Selfless service may seem like unprofitable and risky business.

We risk appearing and being different. We open ourselves to ridicule—even abuse—by unsavory characters and even well-meaning ones. Selfless service is easier said than done because we live in such a quid pro quo world of hidden agendas, subtle deceptions, and a self-centric perspective of “What’s in it for me?” But then again, it isn’t “selfless service” until we take ourselves out of the equation.

What did this commercial stir in you? How might you apply these lessons in your life … in your family … in your business? What role does purpose (symbolized by the heart) play in giving expression to serving?

Another On-Purpose Proverb is “Market in your self-interest. Serve in the self-interest of your client or customer.”

How might this apply to your business strategy, planning, and marketing?

Happy New Year

January 1, 2013 By kwmccarthy

Clarity is the mid-point in the On-Purpose Process. Prior to clarity is chaos and confusion. While not an avoidable state of being, there's little benefit to residing in chaos and confusion any longer than necessary.  Discovery_minicover

Clarity, however, is a beginning point for building and being on-purpose. So the word for 2013 is clarity. Seek it and once you find clarity, leverage it into greater service and opportunity so you can be more on-purpose.

By the way, a great FREE tool to use for finding clarity is the DIscover Guide preview printable ebook. Click the cover to be taken to the download area.  

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Kurt Vonnegut and Drama in Stories and Life

April 11, 2010 By kwmccarthy

Kurt Vonnegut speaking at Case Western Reserve...Image via Wikipedia

I stumbled on this blog post about real life and drama by Derek Sivers about Kurt Vonnegut – an unknown person to me but an iconoclast of some note.   For that alone, I respect him for being more on-purpose than most people.

Vonnegut's chart was enlightening because of its simplicity.  Drama accentuates the ups and downs.  Real life tends to be more moderated (unless you are a 15 year old teenage girl). 

Folks who self-impose healthy drama with exploration in their lives I find to be engaging and interesting.   People who impose unhealthy drama I prefer to avoid. 

Hmmm – just how bold am I living?

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Purpose Redeems the Past, Part 2

July 20, 2008 By kwmccarthy

Thelma was working with a woman named Shirley about a purpose and plan for her life using On-Purpose® tools and methods.  In the course of the coaching, Thelma asked her client to write down her career aspirations.  Shirley refused to allow herself that luxury because her dreams were gone based on some choices she had made in years passed.  This inner city single mom of two children under ten years of age worked two jobs to just barely make ends meet.  She worked a clerical job during the day, went home to fix dinner for her kids in the evening, and then went to work as an orderly at a mental hospital at night.  This exhausting routine was her life.  There was no emotional margin for dreaming.

Thelma is a strong woman who as a single mom herself raised a son and a daughter.  She refused to take no for an answer from Shirley.  Finally Shirley relented under Thelma’s unwavering insistence.  Turns out that this woman was musically gifted.  She could read music, play any instrument, and dreamed of creating an inner city symphony orchestra for at-risk kids.  She would teach them to play instruments and what it meant to be a part of a musical ensemble.  This would be a way to a better life for those kids.

[Read more…] about Purpose Redeems the Past, Part 2

Purpose Redeems the Past, Part 1

July 10, 2008 By kwmccarthy

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.”
Henry David Thoreau (1817 – 1862)

Do you feel like you’ve wasted away so much of your life that you’re now living with regrets?  Where have the days gone?  When did I detour from the dreams and designs of my life and get in a rut?  Have I become a person as Thoreau described – one who is living a life of “quiet desperation”?  Fear and doubt cloud judgment, belief, and confidence. 

Take heart!  Your purpose is an antidote that redeems the past, inspires the present, and directs your future.  What once appeared as a waste of days transforms into a season of preparation.   There’s a full harvest of past life and work lessons that are now readied for gathering.  In due season you plant seeds that bear fruit in the future born from the lessons of the past.

Purpose provides boldness and clarity.   Deliverance from past transgressions may be too hard for you to imagine.  Yet, time and again, miraculous turnarounds begin when the simple act of articulating your purpose takes place.

Gordie Allen, CEO of Leads Plus, Inc., of Killarney, Florida had three brothers scattered across the US.  Since their parents had died the sons drifted apart and seldom spoke to each other.  Gordie attended an On-Purpose® Person workshop in 1994.  There he clarified his purpose and felt compelled to reconnect with his brothers. He devised a simple strategy.  Each Tuesday he would contact one of his brothers in order of birth.  So the first Tuesday he would contact his oldest brother, the second Tuesday his second oldest and so on.  Years would pass.  When Winston, his second oldest brother, died suddenly of a heart attack, Gordie was the only family member who could give a meaningful eulogy because through those years he had followed the routine.  Since the funeral the three remaining brothers have grown closer.

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