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The Professor of On-Purpose

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Part 2: Preparing to Cast Your Vote in the US Presidential Election?

October 29, 2024 By kwmccarthy

Trump and Harris Presidential Election 2024. The meaning of life

My post last week provoked a number of readers, particularly this observation: “Therefore, when it comes to casting your vote for president, look beyond the rhetorical barbs, attack ads, and commercial sound bites designed to appeal to our secular selves. Harris unabashedly leans into a culture of death. Trump awkwardly leans into a culture of life.”

Readers were particularly curious about the terms “culture of death” and “culture of life.” I borrowed these phrases from watching The 1916 Project documentary. Gain context by watching the film for free on the X social media platform. I highly recommend it.

What is a culture of death?
This is a societal moral state whereby human life is deemed to be expendable, meaningless, and without innate purpose. This phenomenon challenges traditional values regarding life and morality and is exercised through abortion, euthanasia, and certain ideologies linked to eugenics and materialistic views. Therefore, putting others to death essentially without due process is justifiable in the situational eyes of the beholder and carries no legal, ethical, or personal consequence. The Holocaust is the ultimate example of this notion carried to its logical conclusion.

The Project 1916 documentary traces our current culture of death as rooted in a 1700s population control philosophy. Like frogs in the proverbial kettle, this once creeping ideology is accelerating into acceptance as a present-day societal norm and practice. Therefore, the convenient removal of an inconvenient tissue mass with a heartbeat from within a woman’s womb is of no consequences to the mind, body, or spirit.

On February 3, 1994, at the National Prayer Breakfast, Mother Teresa  addressed the societal and personal impact of abortion (13-minute mark): “But I feel that the greatest destroyer of peace today is abortion, because Jesus said, ‘If you receive a little child, you receive me.’ So, every abortion is the denial of receiving Jesus — is the neglect of receiving Jesus. It is really a war against the child, a direct killing of the innocent child, murder by the mother herself. And if we accept that a mother can kill even her own child, how can we tell other people not to kill one another?”

According to a report on National Public Radio, in 2023, the number of abortions performed in the US was 1,026,690 — that’s an average of 2,813 terminations of life per day. This represents an increase in abortions since the overturn of Roe v. Wade. The world was horrified on 9/11 as 2,996 souls died in the terrorist attacks, as seen on television. Ending an inconvenient pregnancy in the privacy of a healthcare clinic receives little outcry except perhaps for the one soul being legally executed as the final solution.

What is a culture of life?
This is a moral state where all life is celebrated as sacred, and each person has innate worth, meaning, and purpose, often in spite of our limited ability to see or understand it. These traditional value are rooted in the Sixth Commandment, “Thou shalt not kill.”

In 1776, the US Declaration of Independence put forth the following: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” The concept of Life as a right is codified in the US Constitution, including the presumption of innocence — all are innocent until proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt. Therefore, an abortion like any death sentence demands thoughtful adjudication and rare use as an exception versus the rule.

Yet, like the aforementioned frogs being slowly boiled in a pot, our national and international norms continue a slide into a culture of death, i.e., abortion on demand without due process of the unborn — the most innocent of all and most worthy of our protection — is murderously wrong.

From carrying a baby to carrying guilt
If you are a woman who terminated a pregnancy or a man who pushed a woman for one and you are suffering because of your decision, you have a paradoxical choice. Just because you made a decision for a “culture of death” once doesn’t mean your soul is forever committed to it. You can make a tough shift switch toward a culture of life where healing and wholeness await you.

By definition, restoration is not possible in the culture of death. Philosophically, your abortion carries “no consequences.” “So what’s the problem? Move on with your life,” which was the point of the termination of the inconvenient pregnancy in the first place.

In contrast, only within a culture of life is your complex imprisonment of emotions compassionately recognized as carrying hauntingly adverse consequences. As a result of grace, forgiveness, and acceptance, your deep hurt can be redeemed and your wellbeing restored.

“Elections have consequences.”
In January 2009, shortly after winning the presidency, former President Barack Obama uttered these three words that have become a political truism. The 2024 election will have consequences.

Because of the two-party system, US elections are largely binary events: VP Harris or former President Trump. “Either-or” choices create stark contrasts in what can otherwise be a complex web of competing thoughts. Hopefully, this death or life contrast of cultures offers guidance if you’re feeling lost in the moral trees, having lost sight of the forest fire burning around us.

On-Purpose, for example, uses an “on” light switch as a reminder we are either off- or on-purpose — in the dark or in the light. It’s a subtle nod to another binary choice: Life is either meaningful or meaningless. Naturally, with on-purpose, I unreservedly advocate the “life is meaningful” choice. And I uphold your free speech right to respectfully disagree by voting your conscience.

Be On-Purpose!
Kevin

The Christmas Prayer

December 25, 2020 By kwmccarthy

Here’s the transcript of The Christmas Prayer:

Merry Christmas.

Christmas stands more profoundly relevant and uniting as ever.

Allow me to share a personal life-transforming Christmas story from some twenty or so years ago.

Our then young family was celebrating a holiday at the home of our friends Jen and John. In fact, there were several families, probably 30 people gathered indoors and scattered outdoors.

Various cooks were in the kitchen each prepping their contribution to the potluck feast. Used dishes, utensils, and pots and pans accumulated in the kitchen sink so I stationed myself there to scrub, clean, and rinse. Working with me was Jen, our host. With each newly cleaned item, I handed it to her to dry to be put back in use or put away. We were the Clean Team.

Jen and I often had deep conversations about faith, the meaning of life, the power of prayer, and so forth. While our hands were busy, our mouths were free to talk, and so we did. Our conversation centered around our lives before and after Christ — a Christmas Story of sorts.

Checking her watch, Jen said, “I’ve got a pet-sitting job to do. Come with me. The sink will be fine without us for 30 minutes. We HAVE TO KEEP this conversation going.”

Jumping into Jen’s black Suburban, we talked. Arriving at the welcoming pet’s house, Jen got the dog out and on a leash. Such a small pooch allowed for a leisurely walk and talk.

As we’re ambling along a concrete sidewalk, I came clean: “Jen, before I really knew who Jesus was, I was ‘a good guy.’ I never smoked, drank, or took any illegal drugs. I was never arrested. I treated people and animals with kindness. I was honest, hardworking, and educated. And I was generally happy.

“Let’s say I was 60% good guy and 40% bad guy. But, in that 40%, I could cuss up a storm. Things easily upset me, and I could get combative. I was impatient with slow drivers and always competing to win and ticked when I lost. I took things personally. And, frankly, I felt inadequate, fearful, and anxious.”

I continued sharing with Jen, “On February 14, 1986, Jesus dramatically went from my head to my heart and forever changed my life for the better. Far less cussing and far more patience. Now, let’s say I’m 90% good guy and 10% bad guy.

“But what I really did was take the 40% bad guy and condense it into the 10% of the space. I worked to edge out the bad. Instead, my frustrations, anger, and disappointment just got super concentrated and more explosive than ever.”

Jen listened and nodded for me to go on, “I gave that 10% of me a name: Evil Little Kevin.

“I’m good at concealing him, but he’s always there within me. And, when Evil Little Kevin comes out, he gets REAL ugly, REAL fast! I don’t like me when it happens. It’s exhausting holding him back.”

Jen’s eyes grew large at the thought. She then asked me a short question that forever changed my life. Who knows? Perhaps it will do the same for you.

She asked, “Kevin, have you ever thought of introducing Evil Little Kevin to Jesus?”

I stopped mid–dog walk, “No. It never dawned on me to do that.”

Jen’s next question dug even deeper into my spirit: “Is Evil Little Kevin the part of you which you keep from God?”

I stammered, “Yes.”

“Yes, it is!”

With a little dog scampering about our feet, Jen and I stood right there on that public sidewalk, joined hands, and prayed as I introduced Evil Little Kevin to Jesus.

As my carried and concealed darkness was cast out by the Light of the World, I immediately felt my spirit brighten. The Prince of Peace, the Lord of Lords was on the case, which meant I could let Evil Little Kevin go. Jesus entered that part of my world.

What about you? I haven’t a clue what your “Evil Little Kevin” is up to in your life. But you do.

There isn’t a greater gift you can give yourself this Christmas than to introduce that withheld part of your life to Jesus. Join me by saying a simple prayer and insert your name instead of mine in Evil Little Kevin.

Let’s go!

“Jesus, meet Evil Little {Your Name} who needs to know you. Forgive me for not introducing you two sooner for I didn’t know it was possible. I cut myself free from Evil Little {Your Name}. To fill this void, I invite your joy to take its rightful place. By your sacrifice on the cross, please forever seal this Joy into my life. Amen!”

Evil Little Kevin isn’t a part of me anymore. However, he lurks nearby probing and prodding to regain standing in my life. When Evil Little Kevin worms his way back into my being, my responsibility is to reintroduce Evil Little Kevin to Jesus. It’s that basic.

On Christmas Day, we remember Jesus entering the world. Allow Him to enter into your life, for the first time or for the 489th time. Regardless, may you, too, experience the Peace and Joy of Christmas. In any season, that’s good news!

Merry Christmas!

Are You a Fathead?

September 25, 2018 By kwmccarthy

Dumb decisions come from dumb people or fatheads, right? Wrong!

We’re all subject to making poor choices.

Would you knowingly inflict brain damage on another person or yourself? Would you willingly diminish your brain capacity? Of course not! Hmmm, then again …

  • What if a particular series of your choices repeated over time is making you especially susceptible to being a fathead?
  • What if those choices were within your control and could help prevent you from the compound effect of one bad decision after another?
  • Would you be interested in learning how to improve your decision-making and to stop the waist?

At the risk of offending, this On-Purpose Minute challenges you to look down on yourself for the answer to the question, “Am I a fathead?”

Your waist size is a dead giveaway.

You’ll know immediately if you suffer from this condition while watching this video. 70% of the U.S. population is overweight or obese according to the Center for Disease Control.

This is the confession of a recovering “fathead.” In 2008, I lost 50 pounds and have kept it off since. Honestly, it has been a struggle. I discovered I was an emotional eater when I was really happy or really sad. Doesn’t leave a lot of wiggle room, does it?

I found my right mind by working with Lori, my Health Coach. She gently spoke truth in love into my life and health. She provided me with a meal replacement plan plus regular food while helping me to become more mindful of what and how much I was consuming on a day-to-day basis.

You, too, can work with a Health Coach who can guide and support you in your decision to reboot your brain, bottom, and life. It is very affordable. I’m not talking about a personal trainer who will attempt to grind the pounds off you. Don’t do that! Exercise is great for toning and conditioning but lousy for weight loss. Nutrition is 600% more effective than exercise. The problem is you probably don’t really know how to create a safe, effective, portion-controlled menu for yourself.

If you have Health Coach, then really lean into what he or she has to say. Borrow Can't Out-Exercise a Bad Dietfrom their training, experience, and certification to regain your vitality, vim, and vigor.

Do you want to talk with a Health Coach? If so, I’ll make the arrangements for you. I have an affiliation with health coaches across the USA who will gladly clear your thinking. Email me for a recommendation. Each Health Coach will help your life, health, and style of living be more on-purpose.

———-
Some great weight loss/health quotes:
A waist is a terrible thing to mind. – Tom Wilson
The one way to get thin is to re-establish a purpose in life. –  Cyril Connolly, The Unquiet Grave
Never eat more than you can lift. – Miss Piggy

Are You Prepared To Lose To Gain?

September 11, 2018 By kwmccarthy

In today’s On-Purpose® Minute, let’s explore the gains to be found in loss! You might be surprised just how effective loss can be to our long-term benefit.

How do you deal with loss? What is loss?

Are you prepared to have loss in order to gain?

Locallygrown-produceCould it be that loss and—more importantly—learning how to deal with loss are simply as organic to life as the vegetable section at your local Whole Foods store?

In The On-Purpose Person, I reference fighters, floaters, fleers, and flitters as “styles” for dealing with stress and life. There, you’re encouraged to be a navigator, one who leads and manages through change rather than reacting to and being a victim of it. It takes an inherent calm and peace.

As a formerly ranked tennis player, when I have been in “the zone” on the court, I play without the stress and strain of forcing my play. Things just seem to click better. The secret to getting and staying in the zone to some degree is detaching from the usual expected outcome—to win the match.

The ability to play better comes from navigating the experience positively. It is hard to keep this “above the fray” mindset, but when one does, the body and mind are able to perform seemingly without effort.

In business, on the tennis court, or on the golf course, I’ve seen far too many talented people tighten up for fear of loss. This “choking” isn’t a personal failure; it is a growing experience if we allow it to be instructive versus destructive.

Oddly, loss is important to our health, well-being, and finances because it helps us to mature and grow.

Sailors on a ship may not be aware of the big picture or have the experience to place what is happening to the ship in a proper context. A ship’s captain, however, brings the capacity to navigate the shoals and shores safely even in a storm.

If you are learning—and we’re all life-long learners—then anticipate there are situations when you are a sailor and other times when you are a captain.

Learn from your losses, and your life passage will be calmer and more productive as you gain from each loss.

Will You Be a Boom or Bust?

August 16, 2018 By kwmccarthy

The following text of this On-Purpose Business Minute is dedicated to Baby Boomers, but the video is applicable to anyone in, entering, or exiting the workforce.

Think of a Baby Boomer you know—he or she may be your parents or you.

Three big trends are converging to create an economic swirl of circumstances that will define their next twenty to thirty years.

  1. Baby Boomers are now hitting retirement age in record numbers.
  2. The world economy is unstable and so are many retirement and pension plans.
  3. Baby Boomers are retiring from jobs, but not from life, or the desire (need!) to keep earning.

Many Boomers will find themselves with

  • an empty nest
  • plenty of time on their hands
  • a desire to make a difference
  • a smaller retirement nest egg or pension than anticipated

Rather than heading for assisted living, they’ll be doing a “working retirement”—some by choice and others by necessity.

So what’s your plan for retirement?

Many of your friends may be saying, “I want to retire to Florida or Arizona to play golf, eat out, see movies, read books, relax, and visit my grandchildren.” Some of you may be thinking, “I’m interested in beginning my own business.” I hope so!

Perry James is a character appearing in both The On-Purpose Person and The On-Purpose Business Person. He’s a retired gentleman who provides mentoring and consulting services to a variety of small- and medium-sized business owners.

Perry is based on a dear friend and mentor of mine—Perry Nies, an MIT graduate with a Harvard Business School MBA, and retired business executive and owner. When I was in my early thirties Perry engineered me through some true business challenges. To this day we remain friends and are connected through church. At over 90 years of age Perry is an engaged and vital contributor who still consults and is involved in ministries. He’s also a role model for many Boomers of how to have an On-Purpose retirement.

 

The Baby Boom began in 1945. Today, the wave of Baby Boomers is being presented with a remarkable opportunity to dream and plan their “retirement.” Many will become “retired professionally” but seek to keep an active hand and mind in the affairs of business and life. I know for a fact that the Millennial and Gen X Generations need their wisdom, experience, and skills. I’m at the tail end of the Baby Boom and I value their counsel.

What if the most on-purpose years of your career are just around the corner … and you never make the turn because you hadn’t planned on it?

This blog post is simply my way of putting the challenge before the retiring Baby Boomers—keep Booming (and blooming).

  • Plan new businesses
  • Outline books you’ve always wanted to write
  • Offer your talent
  • Be a mentor
  • Stay connected
  • Think ahead
  • Develop your business plan now not later

Once they’re out of the flow of activity, most never return because they’ve fallen behind and the effort to get back up to speed is overwhelming.

Avoid getting caught short at retirement without a life and work plan. Without one, you’re likely to become a Baby Buster instead of a Baby Boomer.

To Do: Begin writing what your future could be. Download the Discovery Guide to help you get started.

What Is It About This Milestone?

June 5, 2018 By kwmccarthy

(This video was recorded a few years ago, on the event of our daughter, Anne, turning 18.)

It is graduation season. Many young people—and their parents—are facing transition.

It is a milestone for young people in terms of coming to legal age. While parental responsibilities for education aren’t going away anytime soon, it does represent a passage of sorts for all of us. It also presents parents with new options as we begin living more as empty nesters.

What’s your advice to parents about redefining how to best create amazing adult children relationships?

Please share your thoughts by using the comment section below (not email) to help us have a parents’ guide to this new beginning. You’ll help a number of parents facing the same transition.

  • Are your children all adults? Having crossed this threshold, what advice do you have to offer?
  • Have you recently crossed the threshold into adulthood or do you have a memory of your 18th birthday that brings a bit of wisdom or even levity to the matter? Please share it below.

I posted this question on my Facebook page on my daughter’s birthday a few years ago. Here’s some of the advice from my Facebook friends about making a positive parent connection as our children continue to mature:

Michael McMillan – Congratulations, Kevin. Our 3 have passed that milestone, too… and I have no advice 🙂

Mary Tomlinson – My favorite example is that we go from being responsible for them as parents to becoming more of an “advisor,” and being there for them when they need us and staying out of their way when they don’t need us.

Chris Taylor – From the words of Robert Munsch, “I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as you’re living, my baby you’ll be.”

Chris’ quote comes from the book “Love You Forever.” When Charles and Anne were little we read this wonderful book to them over and over. In fact, it still brings a tear to my eye as I reflect on those special times with them when they easily fit in a curled arm.

Are You Paying Attention?

March 27, 2018 By kwmccarthy

“Pay attention!” our mothers and teachers tell us.

Have you ever wondered why we must PAY to be attentive?

My reasoning is that there’s a price to pay for being focused on something of importance. The commitment of our time, energy, effort, and resources narrows our choices and so we will miss out on something else.

My personal, family, fitness, and business schedule keep me on the go from the time my feet hit the floor when I wake up until I fall asleep. So much opportunity, so little time and help.

This means I need to pay attention with intention.

In 1992,Image of clock on wall. "Invest your time. Don't spend it. Don't kill it. Don't waste it." in The On-Purpose Person, I introduced the idea of investing one’s time versus spending it. Paying attention runs along the lines of furthering your investment of your life.

In a world that increasingly tells you “You can have it all,” I’ll be the contrarian and say, “No, you can’t have it all.” Life involves making choices. The sentiment and the reality are miles apart. The cost is distraction and even less traction in life.

Admittedly, there are exponentially more opportunities today than there were 100 years ago. Just because they are there, doesn’t mean that we need to experience them all or can.

My attention span isn’t getting shorter. The span of what captures my attention, however, is more defined and refined. I don’t have time for every trivial thing or thought that comes along. Frankly, I’m becoming less tolerant of trivial pursuits. That doesn’t mean I’m not interested, amused, or entertained by many things. I just won’t pay them as much attention.

Please consider becoming far more selective about where you invest your attention.

Being on-purpose requires us to become a more discriminating and, dare I say it, less tolerant person. It is all a sign of maturity about where we invest our lives and love.

FYI: Shady Side Academy, Fox Chapel, PA. I graduated from SSA in 1973 as the president of the last all-male graduating class. The next fall the school went coeducational. Good move! With over 40 years of coeducation, I reflected on those all males with a measure of fondness for a roommate, Dave Succop, and more close friends Ted Bream and Roy Uptegraff. We were the Morewood Crazies!

Are You Getting Smarter?

January 9, 2018 By kwmccarthy

As you learn more and get smarter, are you gaining in arrogance or humility? You’re headed in one direction or the other. 

Here’s an On-Purpose Proverb to ponder:

Humility is knowing self relative to God.

Knowledge is a good thing, but going all the way back to the original sin in the Garden of Eden, let’s not mistake our smarts with being a self-referenced deity.

As you learn and experience more of life do you ever find yourself asking, Has the world gone crazy or have I? No one of us knows everything. Be gracious toward yourself and others that the smarter you’re becoming the more you are realizing all that you don’t know.

Ignorance isn’t the absence of knowledge. Ignorance is knowing better but doing nothing with it.

Learning is the basis of personal and professional growth throughout life. There’s a downside to learning, however, called frustration. This sets in when we’re in a situation and can prophetically see what’s unfolding next, yet the crowd remains blind.

The elderly are often knocked with being grumpy. Maybe they have good reason. Imagine watching person after person repeating the same stupid mistake you made 50 or 60 years ago. Wouldn’t you want to help them too? Yet when you voice your insight you’re discounted as being too old and out of touch to have a worthwhile perspective. As events happen and a pattern repeats, the quieted elderly person watches and shakes their head knowing that life lessons are very hard to borrow.

We all have a measure of personal pride bordering on arrogance.

Humility, when partnered with curiosity, makes for an inquisitive mind and heart. Asking, rather than telling, opens up someone’s world and lessons to us. It expands our bubble of knowledge.

The truth is somewhere in between. Seniors in years can learn much from seniors in high school and vice versa. Rather than writing the kids off as moral vagrants, the older generation can benefit from the kids’ adaptability, pace, and technological prowess. Teens can benefit from the perspectives of lives lived long, mistakes made, lessons learned, and the humility found in frailty and from wearing Depends.

It can all resolve itself with one word: respect. Despite the riches of the internet, no one has a monopoly on information and knowledge. These advantages are relatively flattened in minutes or seconds thanks to an internet connection and a Google search. WiFi, however, will never replace wisdom.

This On-Purpose Minute provides answers and insights into why knowledge is power and why it can also be confusing and confounding.

Use your power respectfully. True humility is quiet confidence in action.

So the next time you experience a “grumpy” elder, invest a minute or two to learn what they see and understand it from their point of view. Ask questions. Borrow their wisdom. Learn their lessons. You might even bring a smile to their “grumpy” face. More importantly, you might walk away all the wiser.

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